So some loons are offering a $1 million prize to anybody who can capture a verifiable photograph or video of Bigfoot. Why don’t I think they need to be worried about the million anytime soon? I’m thinking it’ll be at least a month before anybody manages a decent enough fraud to fool their panel and claim the money, by which time a million dollars will be worth about enough to get a turnip. Also, they’re not liable for any injury incurred during a Bigfoot attack, so watch out!
The best thing about this is how boneheaded that article is. This part’s my favourite: "There’s no way to authenticate a Bigfoot photograph by itself; the image is simply a two-dimensional pattern of pixels. To truly prove a Bigfoot exists, you’d need corroborating hard evidence like a body, teeth, or bones." I guess this doofus has heard of Photoshop, but he seems to think it’s impossible to fake hard evidence. Oh, journalists can be so cute when they’re insufferably naïve.
June 6th, 2008
Posted by
Darien |
Bullshit |
2 comments
So I was talking to this dude at work, right? And we’re talking about — what else? — the old Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles arcade game. That was all fine and good, but I mentioned that I kind of liked the second Ninja Turtles arcade game better — you know, the one where you travel back in time to fight Shredder because he stole the Statue of Liberty. I was propounding my usual theory on Turtles in Time, which is that it would easily be the greatest video game of all time if only, while you were working your way through history, you had a chance to stop off and kill Hitler. Or maybe if Shredder had pulled Hitler out of the past and built him a robot suit and you had to kill him in the future. The point is, it’s a time-travel video game where you don’t kill Hitler, and that’s frankly completely fucking inexcusable. But what’s even more inexcusable than that is that the guy I work with was all "I dunno about killing Hitler."
So there we are. This dude is a Hitler sympathiser. I quite frankly thought the one thing everybody on Earth agreed on was that, given the opportunity, killing Hitler is your sacred duty, and here I am talking to a guy who says he’s not sure it’s worth it to bother killing Hitler, since he sort of died anyhow.
I’m now taking the opportunity to declare that this web site is staunchly opposed to Hitler. If this web site ever sees Hitler in a café or a train station or a bunker, it will find some way to kill him, probably with shitty CSS or possibly overuse of the <font> tag. I’ve even added a banner to the right side indicating my solidarity with the cause of traveling back in time to kill Hitler. I encourage you all to place the same banner on your web sites because, quite frankly, you don’t want to be mistaken for Hitler sympathisers.
June 6th, 2008
Posted by
Darien |
Bullshit |
no comments
