Outrage ahoy!
Phillies-with-binoculars-gate is one of the lamest scandals in recent memory, but there it is, and here we are. Here’s the deal, for those who don’t know: the Phillies were caught stealing signs against the Rockies the other night. They had their bullpen coach armed with a pair of binoculars, and he was relaying signs back to the team so they’d know what pitch was coming. All of that allegedly, of course, and the Phillies deny it, but come on: the dude had a pair of binoculars, and the video of the game clearly shows him watching the action with them. That’s what he was doing.
I don’t really care much. I mean, the Phillies should get a slap on the wrist, and everybody should be watching for more of the same bush-league shit from them, so they’ll have to endure some extra scrutiny. But some people are calling for some pretty harsh punishments, which makes no sense at all, and not least because the Phillies didn’t break any actual, you know, rules. And here I’m talking about the written kind, and not the special fruit-scented intangible kind that says that you can’t try to bunt during a no-hitter and that everything A-Rod does is wrong.
But let’s face it: people would much rather dole out ridiculous punishments for everything than follow the actual stated rules. This is exactly the same as how people believe Mark McGwire should get a lifetime ban for steroid usage, which had a maximum penalty of something like a five-game suspension at the time. It’s also not very different from assaulting a dude with a potentially-lethal electric torture device for the dubious crime of "being on the field."
Alex Remington has some words on the subject at Fangraphs, and I pretty much agree with everything he says, including his conclusion: people are right to be pissed that the Phillies would do something so lame, but, since they didn’t actually break any actual rules, no punishment should be imposed.
Besides, it’s not like anybody thought there were too many not-assholes in Philadelphia. This is the city that booed Santa Claus, for fuck’s sake.
