Ozzie’s at it again
The world’s mouthiest manager has one or two things to say about his team’s horrible, unconscionable 5-4 loss to the best team in its division today:
"If this was the 1980s, (none) of these guys would be in the big leagues right now, because if you hit .210-.230 and you can’t execute, I don’t think you should be out here. When you can’t bunt, hit-and-run, squeeze and move the guy over, you better hit 40 home runs and drive in 140."
A few points I’d like to make about this. First off, here’s the box score from that game that Ozzie’s talking about. Now, I’ve done the math on this, and the total number of guys on that list who are hitting .210-.230 is: zero (Yes, there is a guy batting much lower than that, but it’s in a very small number of PA, and he’s a AAA callup filling in for the Hose’s regular, awesome, injured CF). So which players exactly are you talking about, Ozzie?
Secondly, aren’t you the guy who, like, puts those players out there? If you don’t think they should be out there, why do you keep writing their names on that card every day? You know, the card that you start with Podsednik and Ramirez, thereby guaranteeing the maximum possible number of plate appearances to the two worst hitters on your team? Though, to be fair, if Scottie Pods can keep up his current pace, he might come within spitting distance of league average this season. He’s on a tear!
And while I’m on the subject, what the fuck do the 1980s have to do with anything? Oh. Right. That’s when you started playing, huh. Obviously players were better back then. Except apparently you, though; holy shit are those some awful numbers you put up, Ozzie. Way worse than Podsednik. I tell you, if it were the 2000s, you wouldn’t have been in the big leagues right then. Incidentally, I don’t think I consciously realised before looking at Ozzie’s player card that OPS+ could be negative. I mean, I knew from the formula that it was technically possible, but I guess I just didn’t realise it ever actually happened.
Also, hey, isn’t Ozzie’s idea that players who can’t bunt better start hitting 40 home runs sort of completely backwards? It seems to me that the usual justification for bunting is, hey, our pitcher is a very bad hitter, and we may as well try to get something out of that free out. Ozzie appears to think that home runs are a crutch that dudes rely on if they’re not good enough at baseball to bunt. Crazyass.
In conclusion, way to fucking harsh on your team after a hard-fought loss against the best team in your division. 5-4, Ozzie. Relax.
"Somebody has to change because if we don’t do what we’re supposed to do, I’ll take the blame because that’s my job."
Finally we agree on something! Yes, Ozzie, somebody does have to change.
