perfectlydarien.com

Old News: Page One

Late Update (05-08-02): But you can still worship me if you want. Working tirelessly, we've uncovered a vicious scandal in the Grudge Match. Want to find out what it is? Well, then, click that link back there. The first one, I mean. The second one goes somewhere else. And this one goes somewhere else entirely. So be careful where you click, or something.

In other news, I got myself a job. I'm sure all of my rabid fans will be glad to hear this. In celebration, you should all go buy some Darien merchandise. After all, everybody loves Darien merchandise. In fact, you should buy some for your friends, too; they'll love it just as much. Oh, and that stuff up above about being careful where you click doesn't apply to anything in this paragraph.

Worship Me! (04-26-02): Today brings us a brand new picture of me, over in the Fan Art section. Want to get yourself in there? Then make a Darien picture! Sorry, not a lot else to say.

Where Does the Time Go? (04-23-02): It's been a bit longer than I expected (or intended), but the second Grudge Match battle has been fought. You can check it out by clicking on this green-coloured text here. Also, I've redone the Grudge Match slightly; I added a navigation bar to make it easy to get from section to section, and I added a table of the current standings in the tournament, so there's easy reference. Make sure you read the new battle before you look at the chart, or things will be spoiled. And just because I feel the need to cram yet another link into this somewhere, you can click anywhere in this independent clause to look at that classic "no" picture again.

Getting it On! (04-15-02): This it it, folks; round one of the Steel Cage Grudge Match has gone down! Find out who won, who lost, and who Stephen thinks is a fag by clicking here! In related news, all you ladies (and all of you men who are "that way") can show your love of the Grudge Match with the new Schopenhauer Baby-Doll shirt in the pd.com store. Remember to buy early, and buy often!

Minor Bug Fix (04-13-02): I fixed a fairly minor bug on the site that caused the navigation bar to look like crap under Netscape in 800x600. It has one side-effect that I don't like, but I'll fix it tomorrow or Monday, when I have more time. Which will also be when I finally post that overdue update. So remember; if I'm not busy tomorrow, update will be then. If I am, update will be Monday. Now that I've gotten that e-mail I asked for. ;-}

Happy One-Month Day to Us! (04-11-02): Plus a variety of new excuses for not updating. Well, pd.com has been up and running for an entire month today. Feel the excitement. It's also been a week since I've updated, as my computer is still not working properly (among other reasons). It seems to be in a better mood, though, so expect an update shortly. If you want to help avoid these constant blackouts, you can participate in a program I'm calling Operation: Tee-Shirt Storm. It works like this. Go to the pd.com online store and buy one thousand tee-shirts. Then I'll get a new computer, and everyone will be happy. You do want everyone to be happy, right? I thought so. And what's $14,990 + s/h between friends, anyhow?

I got off-track a bit there. Anyhow, anyone who wants me to update sooner, send me an e-mail and tell me so.

Still Useless (04-04-02): Just because I care, I even went and fixed the fancy new page banner I made. No idea how it got all screwed up to begin with, but now it's better.

Being Useless (04-04-02): Sorry, but I'm too depressed to be of any use to anybody right now. I tried for hours to update Steel Cage Grudge Match, but I just can't come up with anything funny or interesting. But if it makes you feel any better, I did make a decent page banner for it. So go check that out, anyhow.

It's Game Time! (04-03-02): The Steel Cage Grudge Match is ready to get underway! The draw has been held, and the rules have been read! Get on over there and check it out! You don't want to miss a second of this crazy, high-stakes fight to the finish!

New Feature! (04-02-02): What a productive day this is, eh? We have a new feature for you all, and it'll rock your world with robots and everything. It's called The Wilynator, and you can get there... by clicking on the words "The Wilynator." Either there or back there some more. The applet itself was written by Matthew, who also graciously ported it to javascript when I told him I didn't have a cgi-bin yet. So greatest of thanks to him!

Useless Trash (04-02-02): Also just because I feel like it (see previous entry), I've opened an online store selling all kinds of crap with my logoes on it. So go send me your money. I'll put up more stuff after I get more in the mood to fight with CafePress' obnoxious interface. So then you can go send me more of your money. And then we'll all be happy.

Just Because I Feel Like It (04-02-02): Just because I'm in a quirky mood, I decided to support an e-petition. I think it's one of those things one is required to do when one is a new webmaster. Anyhow, after a bit of searching, I found one I could really get behind, something I really care about. You'll find the banner at the bottom of the page, so go click on it. And don't complain; it's not the silliest mood I could have been in. ;-}

Your Prayers Answered! (03-30-02): At no additional charge to you, the consumer, I have added a navigation bar to the top of the page. One of these days (probably when I have so many features that my nav bar will want to be bigger than one line), I'll put it on the left side instead. But that'll make it a super deluxe nav bar. That will also mean I have to get off my arse and learn CSS2, so it'll be a while. And anyone who thinks I should use nested tables instead, click here, here, here, and here.

Special Surprise: No Updates! (03-24-02): The more astute pd.com fans out there may have noticed the total lack of updates to this site for the last few days. The reason for this is simple: my computer was under the misapprehension that it was a large, expensive paperweight. I have administered to it a sound beating, and it has grudgingly consented to work again. If it changes its mind, I'll... erm... not let you know.

But anyhow, since it's already quarter of forever in the morning, I'll resume normal updates tomorrow.

Surprise Double Update! (03-15-02): Since I had neither a new feature to open today nor any particular sweeping changes to make, I've decided to update Steel Cage Grudge Match not once but twice. That's right - two new fighters today. I'm so generous, I'm practically Santa Claus. Ho Ho Ho.

Update Yet Again (03-14-02): Even more new, exciting content! Once again, I've opened a new feature: The Dord of Liface! Go check it out and be enlightened. It even has a page banner that I *like* - I may well keep that one how it is. In other news, Steel Cage Grudge Match, as I will call it for short, has updated. However, since it will (in theory) be updated every day until it's over, I'm not going to announce every single bleeding update here. From now on, just assume that if you've checked and it hasn't updated, it's just because I haven't gotten to it yet. Also, I fixed the bug in the rotating text up top there; if you didn't notice there even *was* a bug, hey, even better. And if you didn't notice that the text rotated, well, hit the reload button and find out!

Update Again (03-13-02): Yet more content! Yet another feature is open: Great Figures in the History of Religious and Philosophical Thought Steel Cage Grudge Match! Go check it out. Go!

Permanent bug fix (03-13-02): The Netscape font size bug should be squashed pretty hard. The only remaining snag on that is that Netscape users will need to have Javascript enabled, or read little tiny print. If you find any problems with this, let me know. Side note: Opera users, make sure your browser is not set to identify as any version of Netscape. ;-}

Update (03-12-02): Content added! That's right, we now have two - count 'em - features in viewable (though not final) form! I don't want to spoil the fun by telling you what they are, so just click on Internet Poetry Guidelines and Fan Art Gallery to find out!

03-11-02, a day which will live in infamy: perfectlydarien.com opens its virtual doors. I spent all bleeding night working on that page banner, too, so I hope you appreciate it. Then, just for fun, I blew about eight seconds making the little round button down below. So appreciate that, too.

Questions, comments, suggestions, or insults? Send them right along to darien@perfectlydarien.com